


Antibug and Chat Blanc sittin’ in a tree

by Maggies_Scribblings



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Akumatized Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir, Akumatized Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug, Antibug - Freeform, Bad Puns, Chat Blanc - Freeform, Crack, F/M, First Dates, Fluff and Crack, Fluff and Humor, Incompetent Hawkmoth, Post Chat Blanc | No spoilers though
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-14
Updated: 2019-11-14
Packaged: 2021-01-30 17:34:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,758
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21432070
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Maggies_Scribblings/pseuds/Maggies_Scribblings
Summary: Hawkmoth thinks he's hit the jackpot when he accidentally akumatizes Ladybug and Chat Noir!How will our heroes handle being evil together?Shenanigans ensue.
Relationships: Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir/Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug
Comments: 34
Kudos: 324





	Antibug and Chat Blanc sittin’ in a tree

**Author's Note:**

> After the Chat Blanc and Felix double-whammy, it's safe to say we all need a little fluff and humour. The heroes most of all.  
Inspired by Chat Blanc, but no spoilers for the episode. 
> 
> Thanks to [Draxynnic](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Draxynnic/), [Tempomental](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tempomental) and [CaughtFeelings](https://archiveofourown.org/users/CaughtFeelings) for Beta reading the synopsis and encouraging me to write this.

Hawkmoth was desperate. For _three years_ he’d been struggling, and he was as close to his purpose as in day one. He was tired, frustrated and his enemies’ powers were increasing in inverse proportion to his own. Nathalie eventually quit her job after a particularly painful Sentimonster battle. He gave her a very generous severance package and kept her premium health insurance plan with lifetime coverage — heck, he might be a crappy dad, but at least he was a decent employer.

His plans were way over the top, but victims were now few and far between. Chloé Bourgeois had a personal lifecoach on call 24/7 so that she wouldn’t succumb at every tiny tantrum. M. Ramier had to retire to a monastery outside of Paris — to his delight, it included a pigeon sanctuary, and the vow of silence did not cover cooing. Mme. Bustier’s Yoga sessions at school were so requested that she launched a successful chain of wellness centres, with at least one in every arrondissement.

Hawkmoth had become more and more sensitive to any mood fluctuations in the city. Any minor annoyance was now a pretext for akumatization. He found out through trial and error (mostly error) that weak feelings created weak, insubordinate villains. He spent his evenings scanning the city for worthy emotions, hoping against hope he would find that perfect victim.

It was on such a night that he felt an extraordinary disturbance. There was more than one heart on turmoil. He felt disappointment, lost love, jealousy and sweet, _sweet_ pettiness.

* * *

“I gave you everything! The most expensive presents! And you left me because of a little flirt!? _Ma chérie_, please forgive me…”, the wealthy looking young man was begging.

“A little flirt! _A little flirt?_ You took her on a weekend to the Riviera!” His elegant girlfriend was trying to hold back her tears.

“That was for work! come on… At least return the Cartier bracelet!...”

“No! I am keeping it! To remind me that your love was fleeting!”

“Give it back!”

“No! You can’t take it back! Not after what you did to me!”

The man had managed to get the rose gold Cartier Love bracelet from her, and was trying to take it back to Cartier for his money back. During their argument the woman managed to grab it too, and now they were playing tug of war in the middle of the Champs Elysées with a 6.000 Euro piece of jewellery.

* * *

Ladybug and Chat Noir were on their usual patrol route when they heard the screams. They usually circled around the boulevards around the Arc de Triomphe, as the elite boutiques were a magnet for shoplifters and pickpockets.

They rushed to find the quarreling couple, immediately spotting the black butterfly charged with negative power, flying towards the pair.

The events that followed felt like they took an eternity, although only seconds passed. In unrehearsed unison, the heroes were able to separate the fighting duo. The bracelet fell to the ground and Ladybug and Chat Noir reached for it in the exact moment the Akuma infected it.

The distress in the heroes’ hearts was enough for the evilization to take hold of them. They tried to let go of the bracelet, but it was too late. The feeling of hopelessness grew exponentially, as the purple blobs spread further into their bodies.

* * *

Meanwhile, in his lair, Hawkmoth twitched an eyelid as he sensed the unexpected development. Deciding to make the worst out of a bad situation, he swiftly improvised an evil speech.

“Well, well, what have we here?... Our little goody two-shoes finally fell victim to negative feelings!”

Never one to throw away a perfectly good Akuma, he quickly elaborated an alternative strategy. Alas, if his carefully outlined evil schemes rarely worked, this improvised one certainly didn’t show a lot of promise.

“Antibug, Chat Blanc, the citizens of Paris do not deserve you. Always fighting and bickering over their petty concerns! Wouldn’t you like to have a break from heroing? To go see a movie, to dine out, just… to go back to being teenagers? I give you the power of selfishness. You will not worry about anyone except yourselves and each other. At the end of your date you will bring me the Miraculous at the top of the Arc de Triomphe!” Hawkmoth considered the possibility that, should his perfect plan fail, at least he wouldn’t have them barging into his lair.

The purple cloud dissolved and left our heroes in their reversed versions: Antibug’s suit was now mainly black with red spots, and Chat Blanc, just like the first time, was all white with blue eyes. Both had a perfect smokey eye makeup, which made them look even more eerie.

The bracelet had turned into a pair of rose gold handcuffs, which joined her left and his right hand.

* * *

“Well, Kitty, we should make the most of our time off! How about some dinner?”

“Milady, you took the words right out of my mouth.” Chat Blanc brought her hand to his lips, then took the opportunity to link their fingers together, as it was easier to walk the streets than to fly over rooftops while handcuffed.

They left the fighting couple behind, still brawling and now bracelet-less.

The evening was nice and warm, and the walk was very pleasant.

Chat Blanc picked up his baton and selected the song “Close to You” by the Carpenters on his music app, and set it to repeat on speaker.

They passed a jewellery store which was being robbed. The thieves made it out with their loot as the antiheroes walked by, skipping along to the tune.

A few metres ahead, a hotel bellhop who was carrying too many boxes tripped and fell right on the sidewalk. They stepped over him and continued their stroll.

Chat Blanc was acting as flirty as his usual self, whereas Antibug was happily accepting his advances, free from Ladybug’s habitual insecurities and restraints. She did love her kitty, more than she allowed herself to admit.

Chat Blanc took a heart shaped balloon from a little girl and offered it to Antibug with a bow: “You stole my heart the first time I saw you, Milady. It is yours to keep forever if you want it. Antibug blushed and took the balloon, kissing his cheek in appreciation. They resumed their walk, leaving the kid crying her heart out.

They found a nice terrace café. They sat down to eat and drink. The waiters were terrified, but accommodated all their requests, including an excellent bottle of red wine without asking to verify their IDs. They talked and bantered and flirted, just like on a real date. The busboy who cleared their table, flustered by the unusual clientele, dropped his tray of dirty plates. Antibug and Chat Blanc giggled and left without paying or leaving a tip.

They stopped to hear some buskers playing a ballad.

“May I have this dance, Milady?” Chat Blanc asked as he took her hand.

“It would be my pleasure, Chat!”

The musicians finished the serenade and changed the tune to a livelier one, but at the antiheroes’ glares, they switched back to a slower tempo.

“It’s funny, I don’t _feel_ evil,” said Antibug. “Just... indifferent to anyone else but you and me!”

“I could never feel _bad_ as long as you are by my side, my bug... for better or worse,” he whispered as he pulled her closer. Antibug sighed and rested her head on his shoulder, ignoring the musicians who were running away while they were distracted.

Slowly, they made their way to the top of the Arc de Triomphe, where Hawkmoth was waiting.

“Took you long enough, losers!” Hawkmoth offered instead of a greeting. “Now, give me your Miraculous!”

Chat Blanc seemed hesitant to comply. Even in this altered state, he knew that giving up his power might bring the end of the world as they knew it, and even worse, the end of their date.

“Give is a minute, please,” he asked, then turning back to Antibug as Hawkmoth moved away to give them some privacy, blocking the telepathic connection for a while.

“Bug… Milady… this was the best night of my life. Akuma or not, I just need to tell you that I love you sincerely, no matter what.”

“Oh, my dear kitten... I know I usually don’t show it, but you’ve always had a very special place in my heart. Tonight showed me that nobody else could take that place.”

“May I kiss you, Ladybug?” He moved closer and took both her hands.

“You may, Chat Noir.”

Their kiss was intense, uninhibited and burning with years of yearning. Still, their feelings were true, and strong enough to push away the negative magic that was possessing them. The purple blobs seemed to reverse out from their bodies, and back into the handcuffs.

Sure of his imminent victory, Hawkmoth was oblivious to what was happening behind him. Suddenly he felt the Akuma leave the bracelet and heard it clanking to the ground.

“Nnnoooooooo!!!!...” He screamed as he saw the butterfly flying away, leaping off from the Arc de Triomphe to disappear into the night.

* * *

The heroes opened their eyes to see that they had turned back to their normal appearance.

Ladybug hurried to catch and purify the Akuma, while Chat Noir frantically looked for Hawkmoth.

“Chat…”

“_Zut_! He’s gone!” Chat Noir hissed, as Ladybug joined him at the edge of the arch and took his hand.

“Chat Noir…”

“Curses! I can’t see him! Did you see where he went?”

“CHAT NOIR!... Look at me! Do you remember?” She took his face in her hands and looked deep into his eyes. “Do you remember our date?”

His pupils expanded and his jaw dropped. “Yes… _yes_! You didn’t use Lucky Charm. I remember everything! It’s like I’m having amnesia and déjà vu at the same time — I think I’ve forgotten this before.”

“Me too… we did some unpleasant things, but nobody was seriously injured. I… don’t want to use the cure. I don’t want us to forget, this time.”

Taking her hands once more, he tenderly kissed her forehead.

“If you allow me, Milady, I will remind you every day!”

They sat on the ledge of the Arc, snuggling and admiring the Parisian night. They enjoyed the silence for a few blissful minutes, then Chat Noir smirked and began to sing.

“Ladybug and Chat Noir, sitting in a _Tri...omphe_— mfffmh”

She pulled away with a sly grin and completed: “K-I-S-S-I-N-G.”

* * *

_Fin_

**Author's Note:**

> Constructive criticism is welcome and appreciated. 
> 
> English is not my first language and I tend to use UK English. If you catch any inconsistencies please let me know.  
[My Tumblr.](https://maggies-scribblings.tumblr.com)
> 
> Thanks to all the artists posting their Chat Blanc+Antibug works on Tumblr these last few days. They really inspired me to write this. There were a few of them and I can’t choose, so here’s a [search.](https://www.tumblr.com/search/antibug+chat+blanc)

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Not the Lucky Charm I was Looking For](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24557248) by [Nomolosk](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nomolosk/pseuds/Nomolosk)


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